Thursday, December 31, 2009

The 50 Best Films of the Decade (40-31)

40) Casino Royale (2006) dir: Martin Campbell

The best Bond film ever made with some of the best action sequences of the last decade. The only bad thing about Casino Royale is that the best sequence comes within the first 15 minutes, a high-energy chase through a construction zone in a developing African city (I could look up which city, but really?) Quantum of Solace wasn't terrible, but please give the Bond films back to Martin Campbell. He did this one and another pretty good one (Goldeneye). Let's just stick with what works, ok?

39) Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans (2009) dir: Werner Herzog

Honestly, given another few months, this film might move up on the list. A perfectly written, perfectly conceived, and perfectly cast film. Nicholas Cage is the only person who could have played this role, and there are very few roles that I could say that about. Cage's hyperactive, frantic expressions work brilliantly here. John Updike once wrote of Vladimir Nabokov: "Nabokov writes prose the only way it should be written. That is, ecstatically." That's how Werner Herzog directs Bad Lieutenant.

werner herzog and nicolas cage

38) Adaptation (2002) dir: Spike Jonze

Charlie Kaufman and Spike Jonze made amazing films before Jonze went to the big leagues and Kaufman started getting all up in his own business. (Maybe I should see Synecdoche, New York again?) A silly, twisty comedy that becomes a thriller that becomes a comedy again, Kaufman managed to adapt a book about flowers and make it completely about himself. Sounds like something I would do.

37) High Fidelity (2000) dir: Stephen Frears

Frears' best film since My Beautiful Laundrette (boo-ya!), I almost forgot High Fidelity still came out within the last ten years. I was still in high school when I first saw it, and it was maybe the first time I saw a comedy in theaters that was both really funny and "a film." Intensely enjoyable with the performance that made Jack Black a star.

36) Munich (2005) dir: Steven Spielberg

That's right. Spielberg was in top form this decade -- and Munich was neither pro nor anti-Israeli. It presents the story of what men do when they feel threatened, and the systematic process by which war can be conducted in modern times. The film also looks great, and Spielberg creates some wonderfully suspenseful moments. I'm thinking of the sequence where the little girl runs back into the apartment where the bomb is ready to explode.

35) Gran Torino (2008) dir: Clint Eastwood

It's been difficult for me to fully embrace Clint Eastwood as a director. I enjoyed Mystic River, but thought Million Dollar Baby was way overpraised. In the last few years though, I finally got it. His best film is Gran Torino, though the also excellent Letters From Iwo Jima could also be on this list (one of those many Honorable Mention omissions). Gran Torino allows Eastwood one more chance to be the ultimate bad-ass, though he's a bit more crotchety here than when he made films with Sergio Leone.

34) Swimming Pool (2003) dir: Francois Ozon

One of many glorious mindfucks that came out in the past decade, Ozon lets us watch two fine actresses do their thing, with motivation and agenda always under the surface. Charlotte Rampling plays a mystery novelist tired of doing the same old stories. She travels to her editor's empty home in France to get some inspiration. What she finds there is his sexually bold daughter, and a mystery far more cerebral than your standard Agatha Christie.

swimming pool

33) You Can Count On Me (2000) dir: Kenneth Lonergan

"Remember what we used to say to each other when we were kids?" Thank goodness Laura Linney and Mark Ruffalo leave that question unanswered. It's part of the often-brilliant subtlety of this drama. Lonergan's follow-up film, Margaret, comes out this year. We can only hope it's as incisive and well-structured as You Can Count On Me.

32) No Country For Old Men (2007) dir: Joel and Ethan Coen

The film that finally got the Coen brothers their directing Oscar is a masterpiece of suspense. Javier Bardem's performance as Anton Chigurh is one of the most menacing and eerie in recent years. His eyes show no conscience and no remorse. It is his actions, contrasted with the persistent but ultimately flawed police work of Tommy Lee Jones' Sheriff Bell, that lead to No Country's spare and nihilistic conclusion. The Coens' first film, Blood Simple, also took place in rural Texas. This setting is the perfect backdrop for characters that simply get up to no good.

31) The Lives Of Others (Das Leben der Anderen) (2007) dir: Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (spelled correctly on the first try!)

If you haven't seen this film yet, do yourself a favor and Netflix this action. Some people think it suffers from Return Of The King Neverending Syndrome, but I think it ends exactly where it should. For a story that crosses over so many years, and with lives that are undeniably connected, each new twist lends new meaning. Ulrich Mühe plays an agent in the East German secret police in the 1908s. He's charged with spying on a playwright who's suspected of acting against the government. This story develops not because of political intrigue, though, but because of a woman. Even the most hardened of communist politicians have weaknesses.

The 50 Best Films of the Decade (50-41)

I turned 18 in 2000 and spent the better part of the last 10 years watching movies, often more than one a day. Narrowing down a list to 50 was particularly difficult, not just because there were so many good films, but that so many of them resonated and stuck with me throughout the years. This list, therefore, can never be a definitive representation of my real thoughts about the movies listed. More accurately, these are the films that I watched repeatedly, that struck a chord and shaped my outlook.

I'm also going to forgo the usual "honorable mentions" list, as there were literally hundreds of films that I saw and loved that didn't make the top 50, any of which might be on the list in a different time.

Without further ado, counting backwards:

50) Dancer In The Dark (2000) dir: Lars Von Trier

This film somehow survives as the least draining and depressing film Von Trier ever made, and that's just because it has some nice songs in it. Dancer In The Dark explores a young woman's imagination, and Selma Jezkova's is a colorful one indeed. She sees Technicolor Hollywood musicals in a grim, dreary world of deceit. Get performances by Bjork, David Morse, Catherine Deneuve and Peter Stormare round out this sorrowful depiction of rural American life.

49) The Return (Vozvrashchenie) (2003) dir: Andrei Zvyagintsev

Many of the films on this list concern the relationships between estranged fathers and sons. However, unlike the more whimsical take we get from Wes Anderson, Zvyagintsev gives us a harrowing "adventure" in the Russian wilderness. A father returns to take his two sons on vacation in a remote area of Russia after having disappeared 12 years earlier. Zvyagintsev's follow-up film, The Banishment, is still unavailable in the U.S.

48) Death Proof (2007)/Inglourious Basterds (2009) dir: Quentin Tarantino

Okay, I promise I'll only cheat a few more times during the list. Death Proof was technically part of Grindhouse, though I own the DVD separately from Planet Terror, and Inglourious Basterds is a different film altogether, however I'm still struggling with only having a few 2009 films on this list (things take time), so let me put these two together. In Death Proof, Tarantino made a straight-up, 70s B-movie with A-list talent. Most other filmmakers would have made a boring dud, but Tarantino's sharp dialogue keeps us glued until the final car chase, which is really worth waiting around for. With Inglourious Basterds, he does about 10,000 things in one. It's a jumble of WWII archetypes, with a brilliant villain, and some of the best structural set-ups of any film in recent memory.



47) Sexy Beast (2002) dir: Jonathan Glazer

One of only a few debut films on this list, Jonathan Glazer's Sexy Beast is a heist film that's barely about the actual heist. It's all about Ray Winstone's Gal and Ben Kingsley's Don Logan. In the best performance of his career, Kingsley plays a temperamental (to say the least) criminal who flies to Spain to recruit the retired Gal for one last job. What happens when he receives a decisive "No" becomes one of the most quotable and memorable sequences of the decade.

46) Talk To Her (2002) dir: Pedro Almodovar

My favorite among Almodovar's many great films of this decade, Talk To Her, analyzes the relationship of two men and a woman in a coma. There's a level of un-reality in this film, as there is in Volver. We're not sure if we want Alicia to come out of her coma, as perhaps the relationship between her and Benigno is better as long as things remain unsaid, or unheard.

45) The Man Who Wasn't There (2001) dir: Joel Coen

Back in the early part of this decade, each new Coen brothers film release was an event, if only because us college-folk thought another Big Lebowski was on the way. That's not what we got, but The Man Who Wasn't There is the Coen's ingenious take on old American noir. It's grim and futile, but like most of the more nihilistic Coen films (Barton Fink, No Country For Old Men) extremely funny.

44) The New World (2005) dir: Terrence Malick

The Thin Red Line (1997) contrasted the beauty of nature with the frenetic confusion of war. In The New World, we got to really see the beauty the way John Smith must have seen it, or at least as portrayed by Colin Farrell, a much better actor than he's given credit for. Slow and bright, like all of Malick's films, this story is perfectly suited to his lens. (Note: I've only seen the theatrical 135 minute version, not the extended 172 minute edition.)

43) Collateral (2004) dir: Michael Mann

It was a big deal in 2004 that a major filmmaker was shooting an entire film digitally. This format was frightening to see on the big screen at first. But nobody ever captured the grainy, subdued look of Los Angeles the way Mann does in Collateral. Add that to its exciting premise and a story carried by two top-notch performances by Tom Cruise and Jamie Foxx.

42) L'enfant (2005) dir: Jean Pierre and Luc Dardenne

Bruno and Sonia are a young couple in love. He's a petty thief always looking for an easy way to score, so when Sonia presents him with their newborn child, Bruno sells it for a quick buck. Sonia freaks out and Bruno goes in search of the child. This is a film with a clear look at youth, and the fighting forces of responsibility and frivolity.



41) Undertow (2004) dir: David Gordon Green

The best film by one of the decade's greatest new filmmakers, Undertow is equal parts drama, adventure and suspense. Green captures the mood of a decaying South better than most, and Undertow gives us a character in Deel Munn who is greedy, ruthless, and fascinating. We identify with the two runaway children, but want to see more of Munn each minute.

The rest of the list is coming tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

What I Love And Hate About New York

I've lived in Los Angeles for the past 10 years and just visited New York City for the first time since I was five years old. Though I've typically defended L.A. against the standard east coast attacks -- lack of great food, alienating environment, governors who starred in Jingle All The Way -- I think I now understand the charm and allure of New York.

There's definitely a feeling of camaraderie and shared experience in the city that it's hard to achieve anywhere else. That's why, from a true "western" perspective, I wanted to share a few things that I love about New York, and a few things that drive me nuts.

First the good stuff:

1) Jaywalking is legal. There seems to be an unspoken agreement between the police, the cab drivers and pedestrians: we get to walk when cars aren't coming, the police get to hit on girls all day, and cab drivers get to finish their turn as long as the front bumper doesn't come within three millimeters of the back of your heel.
2) Accessible public transportation. I appreciate being able to travel from one area of Manhattan to another in just a few minutes. Once you figure out the placards, maps and signs, apparently written in Swahili lest an undesirable figures them out, you can get pretty much anywhere you want in about 15 minutes. If you get lost, any number of compassionate molesters will come quickly to your aid.
3) Bread and cheese. Your pizza is too damn good. I'm lucky I don't live in New York, because if I did I'd eat about three loaves of bread a day and start looking like some sort of Mario Batali-John Madden hybrid. Why can't Los Angeles replicate that? Is our water somehow not sludge-filled enough?

Okay, now to anger all you hardcore New-York-is-the-best-city-in-the-world purists, a few of the things that make me glad to live where I do:

1) In New York, air conditioners have only two settings: Off and Fortress of Solitude. Seriously, I know it can get muggy, but literally every building I went into for a week had the A.C. cranked up (or down, I should say) to about 45 degrees. Apparently, you're all storing dinosaur embryos, because no room should ever be that cold. You know what we do in L.A. when it gets hot? Open a window!
2) Your beautiful women are actually successful. In L.A. we have tons of beautiful women as well, but at least here they're all struggling actresses or musicians and are desperate for approval! In New York, there are tons of gorgeous women, and yet they're all successful marketers or art gallery curators or journalists. There's no way they'll ever talk to me. I just can't get behind that.
3) Pompous Direction People. Some New York citizens, often just after meeting you, will immediately ask how you got there and what route you took. "I took a cab," I say. To which they reply: "Oh you could have just taken the N train to 14th street and then walked three blocks east to Lexington, or you just walk to 12th and University and take a cab from there up Broadway because it'll save you time, it's like a hypotenuse, then walk four blocks past the National Arts Club to Madison Square Park and pick up a rickshaw from there down to 28th street..." Yeah, I get it, you know your way around. What are you, a Sherpa?

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest, you guys. I'm definitely open to receiving hate mail, but if you send it through the postal service, could you pack some Chinese food from Dumpling House?

Monday, August 10, 2009

People Sounds Like Peephole

This is a poem I wrote while sitting on a park bench at W. Broadway and Beach St. in lower Manhattan. This is not your typical New York poem.

At the intersection of five streets
at an oval-shaped park with
two trees jutting from where the
eyes would be
At the meeting place of buses,
taxis, couples, vagrants, children,
cell phone addicts, those with
their heads down, those with
a poodle in hand
I've practically collapsed on a bench,
My backpack and duffel bag dragged
along beside me, my left heel
pulsating and throbbing with red,
cartoonish pain, and I sit here
and try to take the pressure off.

I have hours to kill, nowhere
to go, no feelings to feel or
companions to tease or criticize, and
I wonder if my entire life has
been building up to this, nearly
three decades of walking, listening,
looking, thinking, experiencing,
to a point where I move my
left foot and try not to feel,
pick my head up and
try not to look,
pull my bags closer toward me
and try not to possess.

There is definitely something here
but I lost it, somewhere between
the bars, the work, the hotel, the
text messages, from that point
to this one.

And here I am now, and there are
beautiful women and babies in strollers
and pigeons and trash and fire escapes.

There are delis and pharmacies
and Irish-themed pubs and
people from Seattle and
Puerto Rico and India and
Chile and New Zealand.

There are street signs and buildings,
water and mail boxes and construction.

And there's also me in there somwhere
With my backpack and my duffel bag,
my swollen heel and my jeans and
shoes and my shirt with the fish on it,
and my red hair and my small hands,
my pen and my notebook and the bench
that I sit on.

Tonight, I'm the only thing that will
be gone. And the wind breathes calmly
and people keep walking and the
sun peaks out through the clouds.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Cause in 60 Seconds

Causecast has a new show we're going to be pushing out every few weeks called Cause in 60 Seconds. For each episode, we'll explore a different event or cause and try and break it down for you as quickly as possible (hint: it'll be about a minute long).

Our latest episode covers the How It Ends event from late June, co-sponsored by Invisible Children, Resolve Uganda and the Enough Project, aimed at supporting the LRA Disarmament bill in Congress.



The video has already sparked some great discussion on Causecast, most notably from the mind of active commenter "revolutionforamerica" who comments:

awesome another bill for the american tax payers! and im sure u all criticized bush for spending money for the war in iraq. liberal hypocrites

Thanks for watching! Be patient, the next video will be coming out soon.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Cemetery Junction - Funniest Film of 2010?

Clearly.



The Invention of Lying looks good. But, the teaser trailer for Cemetery Junction really raises my hopes. Those guys have a really hard time not being funny.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

NY Synagogue Terror Suspects: Real Threat or Just Jokers?

Here's a post I wrote for Causecast.org about the NY terror suspects.

Americans woke up this morning to discover that a terrorist plot against two synagogues in the Bronx, New York, was foiled by the FBI working with New York police. The most troubling thing about this new plot is that the suspects likely had no connection to al Qaeda, Guantanamo Bay or the Taliban.

It should come as no surprise to Americans, however, that there are people out there who don’t like us or that it would translate into negative sentiment at home. Despite our “fight them there so we don’t have to fight them here” mentality, it’s very difficult to segregate communities in the 21st century. Muslims in America are certainly cognizant of civilian deaths in the Middle East, and it is quite clear that these suspects intended to avenge the deaths of Muslims in Afghanistan and Pakistan.



That being said, the new question is, How serious was this threat? The FBI learned about the disgruntled Muslims from a confidential informant, and supplied the suspects with what they thought were IED missiles and plastic explosives. Had the FBI not seen the plan through to the moment when the suspects believed they were setting the bombs, would they ever have made it this far? IED missiles, though plentiful on the streets of Tikrit, are not quite so easy to come by in the Bronx. I don’t think you can just walk over to Ray’s Pizza and order a few with your slice.

Would these four nuts have been as successful in tracking down real explosive devices? According to the Washington Post, the detained men said they were disappointed that the World Trade Center was no longer around to attack. That’s kind of like when you see a really good price for a CD you already own and you wish you could buy it again. Something tells me that the guys who came up with this plot weren’t exactly criminal masterminds.

Terrorist Leader: Alright men, we’re going to blow up the World Trade Center!

Underling: Um…boss…that’s kind of already been taken care of. Maybe we should come up with an alternate target.

Terrorist Leader: Okay, then. Plan B! Where do the Jews hang out?


A couple of synagogues must have been more inspiring than Katz’s Deli on East Houston.

So, I’m obviously thankful that dutiful law enforcement prevented an attack, but I’m not sure these guys were plotting the next 9/11.

Monday, May 18, 2009

No Stairway. Denied!



Now I get it! Wolfram Alpha is just a devious scheme to promote classic Powell & Pressburger films!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Brian Hayward: Get On Twitter!

During tonight's Ducks-Red Wings playoff game (The series is tied 1-1 and the Ducks lead 1-0 after the first period), play-by-play announcer John Ahlers was promoting Fox Sports' new Twitter account. Ahlers then asked color commentator Brian Hayward if he was on Twitter yet. Hazy said that he wasn't quite on Twitter yet.

Let me just say that I'm a huge fan of the broadcasters on Fox Sports Prime Ticket. I've been a Ducks fan for years and years, and any modern hockey fan will tell you that you really form a bond with your local commentators, simply because you spend about 80+ nights a year watching and listening to them (you see, in hockey, most of the games are not televised nationally, and I prefer Ahlers and Hayward to Mike Emrick and Eddie Olczyk anyway.)

Brian Hayward has a pretty strong following in southern California, for his ab-solutely sen-sational analysis of hockey and his nightly "Hockey 101" and the pun-ny "Breaking Through the Hays" segments. Because of his affability and local notability, I am hereby requesting that Brian Hayward start a Twitter account as soon as possible.

As both a Ducks fan and Managing Editor of an Internet start-up company, I am volunteering myself as the perfect person to teach Brian Hayward all about Twitter. For one thing, I hate social media and the culture surrounding it as much as any head-scratching middle-aged person (Hazy is 48). Also, I can teach him how to keep his tweets focused, humorous and informative. Though my Twitter feed is a mish-mash of song lyrics, sports news, jokes and Diddy-isms, I feel I have the optimal amount of experience and know-how to transform Hayward's Twitter feed into an O.C. sports phenomenon.

Within weeks, I guarantee we'll have Jim Fox and Stu Lantz begging me for Twitter tips (or Twips, if you will).

How about it, Hazy? Give me a shot.

Second period is about to start now. Go Ducks!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

How I Survived Swine Flu or Pork: The Other Black Death

Practice!

Ha ha. Just kidding, of course. No, beating the swine flu is a grueling battle between Man and Virus, with pigs in between, perhaps serving as referee. I have a few tips that I've gleaned in the past few days, my head hovering over the toilet like a frat boy, the illness spreading through my bones like the sweet current of heroin. I also did my research through Causecast's Swine Flu Safety tips.

Tip #1: No making out with pigs. I can't emphasize this one enough. If pigs had the flu and now we had the flu, it serves to be true that making out with our ham-hocked friends might be a bad idea. Skip it for now. You'll live.

Tip #2: Sneeze into a tissue or, failing that, a nearby spittoon.

Tip #3: No more than one McRib sandwich per week. This may seem counter-intuitive, but it's important for our bodies' immune systems to receive small bits of acrid poison, in order to build up suitable antibodies. A small amount of swine flu, a runt flu, if you will, is just what the doctor ordered.

Tip #4: Watch Charlotte's Web, but after the film ends, pretend the farmer takes Wilbur out behind the barn and shoots him. This will suitably build up ones hatred of pork, a potent antiviral attribute.

Note: These statements have not been analyzed for accuracy by the FDA, CDC, or The Who (listen to Baba O'Reilly backwards....trust me, it's all about swine).

Monday, April 27, 2009

Ptwitty has his fingers on the voice of the people

While the rest of Twitter is abuzz about Swine Flu and The Rescue, Diddy is attacking the real issues:

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

'One Of My Kind,' Conor Oberst documentary

I would say "I hate to plug," but I'm actually quite excited about the opportunity musician Conor Oberst has given Causecast. Guitar-tech Phil Schaffart filmed Oberst and his bandmates as they recorded an album in Mexico. The result is the 60-minute film One Of My Kind, the story of Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band. Watch the trailer below:



All you have to do to get the film for free is to sign up on that page. Tomorrow, April 15, you'll receive an e-mail with instructions on how to stream or download the film. Causecast hopes that you'll take the time to explore our list of organizations and donate to a cause that inspires you.

If you don't have any money to donate (and who does, really?), I'd encourage you to read about the organizations we're partnered with. Our goal is to connect nonprofits and people to inspire activism in this new era of hopefulness. Whether it's universal health care, animal rights, poverty, clean water or gay rights, you can connect with a group through Causecast that can help you get involved in the cause you're passionate about.

Giving away the Conor Oberst film is just one way we're trying to bring attention to our prestigious list of nonprofit organizations.

Okay, back to sperm jokes.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Jason Statham Poster Contest

I'm announcing a new contest here on Country Caravan. Below are a series of Jason Statham posters. Your job is to guess each of the films that they're from. I promise that I have not altered the images in any way except to Skitch out the titles and co-star names. These are all 100% real posters for different Jason Statham films.

The first one to post the correct answers as a comment on this blog will receive a one-time Country Caravan Shout-Out. Don't think that's worth anything? Remember, Arcade Fire got big because I mentioned them here.

Also, please do not use the Internet to find the answers to these. We're on the honor system here. Let the games begin!











Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Joining the Causecast Team

I announced about two months ago that I would be leaving Mahalo.com to pursue other opportunities. Though I maintain a very good relationship with Mahalo and plan on soon being a stockholder in the company, I felt it was time to take a break and think about what I wanted to do in life.

Much sooner than expected, I've landed a short distance away (you don't know how literal this is) at the socially conscience start-up Causecast. I'll be acting as their Managing Editor, working to add inciteful, thoughtful and original writing to their already deep and impressive index of videos and nonprofit connections. I hope, through this position, to further contribute great content to the Internet, in the form of essays from notable figures and writers who are truly passionate about causes. I also hope, quite selfishly, to give back to my community in the form of time and commitment (money is, after all, a bit scarce for us all right now).

Causecast is up to some very exciting things and I'm pleased to be a part of the team. A few employees will be at SXSW next week for the Mustache March. Check out the latest video:

Friday, February 20, 2009

off the record

In the first few months of the inception of a personal blog, one tries to inject, immediately, a sort of creative originality to the already tired structure of hourly, daily, or weekly posting. Those of us who blog and also claim to be actual writers will try to write about our lives with texture and nuance, not reaching the respectability of David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs, but hopefully a step above the MySpace journal of a teenager. This is not to say that teenagers don't have anything thoughtful to say, just that we adults like to pretend our lives are not so banal and petty.

However, despite previous efforts, Country Caravan has become a source for me to post trailers for movies I'd like to see, tell you all about how cool my music is, and occasionally complain about being short.

There's nothing wrong with any of these things, except it makes me feel entirely unoriginal. Not only am I the same as everyone else, but everyone else is a freaking blogger.

The hardest part about pretending to be a writer is realizing that you don't think you have anything to say, and that even if you did there would be no reason for people to listen to you. At the very least one can hope to be entertaining. After all, I may not have great insights, but I could hopefully make you laugh. The obnoxious thing is that most people think they're good at whatever it is at which they're mediocre. It could be writing, singing, entertaining others, drawing, pretty much anything creative. I wish my ambitions were more simply defined. If I was really into basketball and wanted nothing more than to be a basketball player, it would be easy to squash those dreams. I'm just not very good at it. I don't have the physical attributes or the skill necessary. I don't think anybody would attempt to hide this from me, and if I had unbearable confidence and still thought I could make it in the NBA, you'd be right to assume I was a little bit off my rocker.

Yet, in more subjective areas, everyone can be a genius. Nobody can tell you you suck at drawing. After all, there's no such thing as good drawing, right? Yeah, there are those people who are really good at drawing Disney characters, but my 12 squiggly lines here have just as much artistic merit. Right?

The problem is that people are much more hesitant to say that you suck at something like drawing or writing poetry. Oh Christ, don't get me started on poetry! How many terrible poems have you read in your lifetime? I've definitely read more bad than good. I don't know what it is that makes a poem good because some words sound nonsensical on first listen, but you can tell the difference between J. Alfred Prufrock and some weepy teenage crap. But, that's just it! If you tell someone they're a shitty poet that makes you a total jerk. It's a huge double standard.

At any rate, where is this going? I don't know. This is what I thought blogs were before I started one. A bunch of losers whining about life. Can I do it like this for awhile?

Oh, and if you're a possible employer, I'm not usually like this. I'm really good at stuff.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Inglorious Basterds trailer. Oh. Hell. Yes.

Thank you thank you thank you for this. I now have a reason to save 12 dollars so that I can buy a ticket for Inglorious Basterds on August 21.

Watch the trailer:


Now I need a nap. So many kinds of awesome.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Lil Wayne Somehow Gets More Fascinating

I know he's been the subject of several posts on Country Caravan and featured in my dreams on Super Eco, but Lil Wayne just keeps managing to amaze me.

Here's a sneak preview of him on Katie Couric's Grammy Special:



I mean Jiminy Christmas Wow. He's a journalist, a rapper, a gangsta and a junior. I actually have weird man-crush daydreams where Weezy and me are hanging out on the street, talking about social injustice. His name is Dwayne and he dropped the "D" so I'm thinking about doing the same. Just call me Onathan.

FAKITY FAKE FAKE